As Valentine’s Day approaches I see, like every year, ads, on social media, on commercials, and in stores, pitching gift sales for your loved ones. Yes, it is very important to display your love and gratitude for the people around you but I tend to argue that just once a year, on a holiday, is an excuse. It should be done year-round. What I fail to see around this time of year is the importance of self-love and I think that is a huge failing to society as a whole.
Self-love is honestly very hard to describe. It is loving who you are, having confidence in yourself, being okay with who you are as a whole. It is not narcissism, it is not unhealthy, it not unachievable. It is extremely important.
Why is Self-Love so Important?
There are many psychological reasons. I found a very well written article that outlines some. The article is here, but I wanted to look into a few of the reasons they give.
Accepting Yourself Makes You Happier.
I’m sure we all have some time in our lives where we just are not sure with who we are, where we are going, and what we want in life. Usually this feeling arises during high school which is why high school is so hard. You have to find a place. Where do you fit in? Are you fitting in or are you changing yourself for others? It can be a very unhappy time. As we grow, move out, go to college, meet new people we tend to figure all those questions out a bit and we become happier. Find out what you want and who you are and be happy with it. Once you’re happy with yourself you’ll be happier overall.
Self-Compassion May Help With Mental Health Issues
I have struggled with depression in the past, I still struggle everyday with anxiety, it wasn’t until I was able to give myself a break and be compassionate towards myself that I was able to get past things. Instead of beating myself up over a botched conversation I let it go. This helped me not create further anxiety that I might do the same thing again. This helps me laugh with others if I do something that’s a stupid mistake rather than beating myself up for ‘looking stupid.’ It has been very freeing. You never really understand the importance of being able to laugh at yourself until you have anxiety and need to practice a little self-compassion.
It Can Push You to Stop Procrastinating
Motivation is so important to keep from procrastinating. Motivation is so important to reach your goals. If you see no reason to try, if you’re not compassionate towards yourself, and if you’re beating yourself up, you’ll see little reason to do much of anything.
What Can We Do to Help Ourselves With This Self-Love?
There are so many things. A few I’m trying…
Change your mindset. When you look in the mirror and see your momma body, remember why it has stretch marks, why your belly sags, why you gained a couple pounds. You were growing a baby inside you. You now are raising that baby to be a good, strong, confident human. It’s a miracle momma, it’s not anything else.
Journal. If you ever have doubting thoughts write them down. It’s so important to not stew on things. I’ve heard time and time again that sometimes it’s just best to even write something down then shred it or burn it. Let it go.
Respect who you are.
This Valentine’s Day do not forget to do something for yourself too, especially you mommas. Take a break, get out, relax, have an hour of baby free time, and remember you are wonderful, beautiful, confident, and strong.