I know for me I tend to always put others first. Whether it be my husband, kids, parents, siblings, or simply friends. I have a hard time saying no. Why? Because I want to help. I always want to be there for others and be someone they can rely on. How can this be harmful? As we make others a priority over our own self care we can often times silence what WE want. This can mean agreeing to go to events that we don’t want to and helping others when we do not have time. We can spread ourselves too thin. We can start to feel used and unappreciated while not taking care of our own needs we also feel frustrated. This is why an important part of changing our inner voice to a positive one includes taking time for self care.
Women can often find it difficult to put themselves first.
This can be a huge problem for women in general. Why? Because as women we are taught, generally unintentionally, that we have a role to nurture. When women are not nurturers (such as women that do not want to have kids) it’s so out of sorts its questioned and judged. Women also for centuries were silenced. Taught that our feelings and wants should be suppressed. Often we see self care as selfish.
How do we make self care a priority?
Remember Self Care is NOT Selfish
Taking time for yourself and practicing self care, whether its taking a bath, getting out without kids, or saving the household chores for another day. You could be putting aside work for a night, or simply remaining off social media. The mental relaxation we can achieve from all of these self care activities can ultimately help those around us. When we remain exhausted and frustrated it can often overflow in how we interact with others.
How can you make self care a priority?
Make a list of activities that relax you and restore your energy.
Relaxing, rejuvenating activities are critical to truly making self care a priority. From the list of activities make a list of what activities you can do daily, weekly, or monthly. There’s bound to be some activities you cannot do everyday, like getting a facial, but perhaps a monthly facial date for yourself is in the works.
Make the time and schedule your self care activities. Stick to the schedule and say no to others that may ask for your attention during your self care time.
When you’re doing your self care activity, be present and in the moment, do not sit worrying about the kids, the house, cleaning, health, job, etc. Sit and relax, let the worries wash away for that short time.
How does self care improve our inner voice?
Practicing self care regularly can greatly increase our self esteem and self worth. How? When we are constantly doing things to please others, putting others first, we are not doing activities that our body needs to relax, restore, and rejuvenate. This can harm our self esteem and self worth. Feelings like anger, frustration, and sadness wash over us. Greatly increasing anxiety and depression.
Practicing self care, however, taking time to truly do what we need to be present and relax can reverse these feelings and increase our self esteem.
What do you like to do? What relaxes, restores, and rejuvenates you?
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