Over the weekend, the night before Mother’s Day, I went and saw Tully. I am a typical mother. I stay at home/work at home with my two wonderful kids. I can get very lonely. I can get very deprived of some sort of adult interaction. I finally got a chance to get out with a wonderful friend of mine. My best friend I’ve known since I was in the 7th grade. We went and saw Tully.
We saw Tully because it was the movie I wanted to see. I saw previews and was intrigued. As I understood it, Tully was a movie about postpartum depression and just needing a little extra help.
In reality, it is about so much more then that.
The main character, Marlo, is a mom of two kids, a girl and a boy. The boy can be a lot of extra work they have been to specialist after specialist and they don’t have answers. My best friend, who works as a Habilitative Interventionist, working with kids with downs syndrome and autism on a regular basis turned to me and said “he’s autistic.” Marlo is also pregnant, just about to pop pregnant.
The Night Nurse
During a visit with Marlo’s brother, who appears to be doing very well for himself, she finds out that he would like to pay for Marlo to have a night nurse to help her after the new baby is born. He explains that the night nurse will help let her get sleep and that his wife used one. He also eludes to a very hard time she had right after Jonah was born.
At first Marlo does not want to ask for help but then she seems to give in. You meet Tully a young, full of life, woman who comes to help take care of the new baby girl, Mia. Tully seems to be there helping Marlo in so many ways, not only letting her sleep but being a good friend of sorts. Talking to her, helping her work through issues and helping around the house including making cupcakes for Jonah’s class and cleaning the house.
The turn happens, the part that you don’t suspect.
When Marlo and Tully go to New York to just have fun and get some drinks one night. On the way home Marlo falls asleep at the wheel and crashes into a river. Next you see her in the hospital. The doctor talking to her husband tells him that Marlo is extremely sleep deprived. This surprises him. Marlo seemed to be doing wonderfully. As he gives Marlo’s information to the receptionist you find out Marlo’s maiden name is Tully.
Marlo was hallucinating Tully, and who was she?
She was Marlo. Tully is a young Marlo.
Throughout the movie Marlo has conversations about who she was before marriage and kids. She was a lively young woman. She dated around a lot, she had no worries, no responsibilities that were pressing, just her.
The movie really struck me.
It can be so hard to be a mother. One reason, is because it can be very easy to lose who you are. You become a mom, you become the main support for your children, cleaning them, dressing them, feeding them. They become your focus.
My husband and I, during Mother’s Day yesterday, spoke about this a lot. I do not think about myself anymore, even when I really should, I tend to think about him and the kids first. What do I want to do? I tend to defer to him or what we should do for the kids. What do I want to buy tends to turn into what I want to buy for the kids.
Not to mention I used to be an artist, a tap dancer, an entrepreneur, though I am pursuing that still, I had so many more titles then just mom, before becoming a mom. The moral, the point at the end of the story is, no matter how hard it is, no matter how lost we may feel at times, we wouldn’t change it for the world. Marlo loves what they are, loves her family, and so do most all of us. We may feel lost at times but our family is the world to us. That’ll never change.
I definitely recommend Tully, it is not only a movie all moms should see but also dads, grandparents, and those without any kids.