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Moving Past Mom Guilt

Parenting comes with so much joy, but also exhaustion, frustration, fear, and guilt. Each family has their own parenting style, rules, and goals, but it is hard not to compare. There can be this constant feeling as if you’re not doing enough as a parent. Mom guilt can come from many different sources such as societal expectations, parenting books, social media, family expectations, judgmental acquaintances or even strangers.

Having some mom guilt can be productive. It is good to worry and pay attention to our child’s needs and how we are meeting them. However, mom guilt can get out of control. What works for your family should not be changed because your mom guilt is taking over and you’re changing decisions based on guilt and comparisons to others.

How should you make sure mom guilt is not taking over?

Take a Break

Do what you can to remember, you know your family and kids best. It can be hard to see other families, other mothers, and other children and not compare. Take a break for yourself when thoughts of mom guilt may be getting a little too overwhelming. Take a bath, get a pedicure, do whatever you can that’s relaxing.

Surround Yourself with Supportive People

Mom guilt grows and feeds off negativity around you. Make sure your family, friends, and other acquaintances are supportive. No passive aggressive comments, parenting judgment, or comparative and rude boasting.

This can mean getting space from people that cause guilt in you. Perhaps you have a family member that constantly brags about their child’s accomplishments. If your own child is behind or not progressing the same manner it can be hard to not compare and feel guilty over your own child’s abilities. Set personal boundaries and remind yourself of your own child’s strengths when you are around the extensive braggers.

Consider the other person’s perspective

When you’re met with advice or parenting opinions remember that person is speaking from their own perspective. It’s very likely they do not understand your family dynamics or child’s special needs.

Remember your child loves you

Mom guilt can take over and we can feel like we are failing, especially when we have rough days. But, most the time, our kids see the good and their love can be unconditional. Remember you’re doing your best.

Sarah

Similar Posts:

Dealing with the Mental Load of Motherhood

A Time I Witnessed Clever Parenting

8 Ways to Avoid Mom Burnout

4 Things New Moms Want to Say but May Not


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6 Comments

  1. I have so much guilt sometimes its awful. As a mom i seem to take everything to heart. I will have to try some of these and see if they help.

  2. Mom guilt is such a real thing. I feel it on and off with my two kids sometimes but it’s true, they still love us even when we feel we are not doing enough for them at times. Great article!

  3. Laura says:

    Mom guilt is so real. There are just to many “right” ways of doing anything mom related. And it’s far to easy to get sucked into the second guessing yourself trap.

  4. There are so many different feelings involved in parenting it often gets over whelming and Moms guilt Surely exist, I practically go through it each day but when I see my kids happy even with small thing and their hapoy faces make me forget all my worries.

  5. It’s so easy to feel guilty at any point. But the fact that my baby loves me unconditionally keeps me sane

  6. Oh Mom Guilt. It can be a serious butt-kicker. It can also be motivating like you mentioned. But I think your idea of surrounding yourself with supportive people is HUGE. Not everyone is going to parent the same way – nor SHOULD they, but it’s all too easy to feel like you’re doing something wrong because someone else is parenting differently.

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