There are many different things I learned in school, giving a hug wasn’t one of them. I have an MBA in Entrepreneurship. One thing they teach you in business school is the art of first impressions. You learn about elevator pitches and hand shakes. They teach you how to give a strong, confident hand shake, but they do not teach you how to give a strong, warm, comforting hug. Why? Well because rarely do we hug in a business setting.
When would we need to know how to give a good hug?
We give hugs to family, friends, loved ones. Sometimes we give hugs to strangers. Sometimes we will give hugs to acquaintances. Hugs are a great way to show others you care, love them, want to reassure them. Hugs are a wonderful way to show others they are not alone.
What does a hug do? How does it make us feel?
Hugs give us a feeling of love, warmth and reassurance. When we give a hug, or receive a hug, we are aware that we are not alone. There are others that care about us. Some days hugs are a necessity. They relieve stress and anxiety. There are so many days I need a good hug. There are so many days I love giving out good hugs to those that need them. Hugs improve our health.
What makes up a good hug?
Well maybe its best to start out with what does not make up a good hug?
A good hug is not weak. A good hug is not light. A good hug is not fearing touch.
A good hug IS strong, a good hug is warm, a good hug shows you have no fear of the other person. A good hug takes longer then a couple pats to the back. A good hug has a squeeze or two.
How do you give a good hug?
Go in confidently
Make a decision and stick with it. Are you going to give a hug? Then do it. Go in for the kill and be confident. It can be very obvious to others if you’re hug is not confident and it can be deterring to that person. Why are you not confident? Do you want to be hugging them? Do you trust them? Do they smell? Believe me, a lot of the time when I do not get confident hugs I wonder what makes that person unsure about hugging me.
Put some strength into it
There are few things I hate more then what I call a “weak ass hug.” This is something that is just like a good handshake. Put some strength into it. Your arms should actually touch the person. You should even give them a little squeeze.
Take a breath
Do not release the hug until you’ve at least taken one deep breath. It’s the perfect amount of time. Not too long, not too short.
Hugs to comfort others
When you’re giving hugs to comfort others let them choose how long the hug will last. When someone really needs to be comforted, when they really need a hug, they may need a long, strong, hug. Let them choose how long it lasts. Stay confident in the hug until you feel them releasing. Let them cry on your shoulder if need be and let them bask in your warmth and comforting arms.
Remember these things because, I know I cannot speak for others, but I personally hate a weak, sad, light hug. I do however LOVE a strong, warm, confident hug.
What are key features you think are needed for a good hug? Do you like to hug?
Sarah
Spread love and joy, hugs matter.
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